The 3 P’s of Failure…Part 2
I want to go even deeper as it relates to the heart and discuss 3 more deadly P’s: Procrastination, Poison, and Pain.
1. Procrastination. I am going to come back and finish this one later…when I finish discussing poison and pain…after my show goes off…right before I go to bed…when my grandma gets out of the hospital…when the kids get in high school, when I save some more money…when I finish my degree…
I think you get my point.
2. Poison. When you become bitter about something or someone, it really eats you up inwardly and causes you to miss out on opportunities to improve your life. The bitterness becomes a self-inflicted poison that clouds your vision, your hearing, and your actions. For example, let’s say you have been betrayed by someone who said they wanted to help you get your business off the ground, but instead they stole your idea, skipped town, and changed their phone number. That hurts. The worse thing you can do is become bitter and make the statement I have heard countless times: “I will never trust anyone again.” You basically just sealed your own coffin of fate. You cannot allow your previous experiences to lock you out of your future. Yes, situations like the one I described above hurt, but you don’t have to get bitter. Trust me, someone is going to show up who really does want to help you, but if you live based on your past hurts and rejections, you will close the door before it even opens.
3. Pain. My pastor says we are conditioned to move away from pain and towards pleasure and I totally understand what she means. It is easy to dream but very difficult to do what you dream about. Afterall, there is no fear of being hurt, rejected, swindled, or denied when you keep your goals and aspirations locked up inside your head. Stepping out there can be painful and we are conditioned to move away from pain and towards pleasure. Once you have felt the pain of being defeated, denied, or rejected, it is really hard to get back out there. I applied to graduate school last year totally certain that I was going to get accepted to not just one of them, but all of them. Actually the opposite happened.
I got rejection letters from not just one of them, but all of them. For a minute I felt really, really disappointed. I had been so confident saying my faith confessions and speaking my way into my destiny. I just knew that I was going to get acceptance letters and have my choice of where I wanted to go to school, but that didn’t happen. I really thought about throwing in the towel regarding pursuing my Ph.D. I begin to tell myself different reasons why I didn’t need to waste time, energy, and money doing research and studying for 5-6 years. The bottom line was I didn’t want to have face the pain of being rejected again.
That’s when Betty Wright’s famous anthem begin playing in my head: “No Pain, No Gain.” That’s right. “In order to get something, you got to give something. In order to be something, you got to go through something.”
Yes, she was talking about preserving a relationship, but the lesson applies to everything that you are fighting for. Pain is synonymous with Gain. Many of us have been centimeters away from success, but we gave up too soon because we were hurt, tired, exhausted, and sore. When you feel pain, dig deep. The finish line is only milliseconds away.
I am applying to graduate school again. I have hushed the “what if’s” in my head and replaced them with “when I”s.” You should try it. Instead of saying “what if I don’t get the promotion”, how about saying “when I get the promotion…” You will be amazed at the results.
Pain is not a message of defeat. It is a message of destiny. Lick your wounds, ice your bruises, and get back out there and fight. No pain, no gain.
One last “P” for you and I’m done: People. If you think you can get over hurdles like procrastination, prejudice, pickiness, pride, poison, and pain by yourself, you are sadly mistaken. Me, myself, and I is a terrible trio. Put someone on your team besides yourself and trust them. You’ve got work to do. Let’s go!